No Nursing Home For me
Posted 18 March 2005 - 10:58 AM
About two years ago my wife and I were on a cruise through the western
Mediterranean aboard a Princess liner. At dinner we noticed an elderly
lady sitting alone along the rail of the grand stairway in the main
dining room. I noticed that all the staff, ship officers, waiters,
busboys, etc. all seemed very familiar with this lady. I asked our
waiter who the lady was, expecting to be told she owned the line, but
he said he only knew that she had been on board for the last four
cruises, back to back. As we left the dining room one evening, I caught
her eye and stopped to say hello. We chatted and I said, "I understand
you've been on this ship for the last four cruises." She replied, "Yes,
that's true." I stated, "I don't understand" and she replied without a
pause, "It's cheaper than a nursing home."
So, there will be no nursing home in my future. When I get old and
feeble, I am going to get on a Princess cruise ship. The average cost
for a nursing home is $200 a day. I have checked on reservations at
Princess and I can get a long term discount and senior discount price
of $135 per day. That leaves $65 a day for:
1. Gratuities which will only be $10 per day.
2. I will have as many as 10 meals a day if I can waddle to the
restaurant or I can have room service (which means I can have breakfast
in bed every day of the week.)
3. Princess has as many as three swimming pools, a workout room, free
washers and dryers and shows every night.
4. They have free toothpaste, razors, soap and shampoo.
5. They will even treat you like a customer, not a patient. An extra $5
worth of tips will have the entire staff scrambling to help you.
6. I will get to meet new people every 7 to 14 days.
7. TV broken? Light bulb need changing? Need to have the mattress
replaced? No problem! They will fix everything and apologize for your
8. Clean sheets and towels every day and you don't even have to ask for
9. If you fall in the nursing home and break a hip, you are on
Medicare. If you fall and break a hip on the Princess ship, they will
upgrade you to a suite for the rest of your life.
Now hold on for the best! Do you want to see South America, the Panama
Canal, Tahiti, Australia, New Zealand, Asia or name where you want to
go? Princess will have a ship ready to go. So don't look for me in a
nursing home, just call shore to ship.
PS And don't forget, when you die, they just dump you over the side at
Posted 18 March 2005 - 05:07 PM
I didn't lose my mind - I have it backed up on a disk ... somewhere
Posted 18 March 2005 - 06:23 PM
Posted 18 March 2005 - 06:30 PM
Posted 19 March 2005 - 08:00 AM
Check out my artwork at:http://www.jimdemick.com/
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